i love them.
the past couple of years, i've thought alot about what it is that makes someone "creative". what is it that causes a person to MAKE things, or to express and communicate in order to share and inspire. or maybe just because they HAVE to...
and i've never, ever considered myself really one of those artistic people i so love to spend time with and befriend. i consider myself lucky to know them personally, and be allowed to share in their enthusiasm for whatever their craft(s) may be.
but then there are stories. this i understand. everyone has one, or two. some of us seem entirely composed of them, some don't seem to know they have 'em. when i say story, i mean the personal ones, the ones you share over a cup of coffee in a busy bookstore where no one knows you but the friend across the table. or the story you tell to dear friends in order for them to see something Greater than yourself ... the stories that explain YOU. and i don't mean an autobiography endorsed by oprah either.
i mean the ones with nasty grit, and undeniable truth, the ones that make you blush or grin - commiserate or finally connect. these are the tales you tell yourself over and over, and the myths of self-perception you share with others. in telling these stories, you see yourself, and allow someone else in, if it be only for a moment. maybe we do this out of desperation, a final act of honesty. maybe we tell because we hunger for love and attention. maybe our stories aren't always exactly true, but their what we saw and felt at the time, and looking back and naming it is the only way you can move forward.
stories represent so much for me. i love reading a good story, or hearing it told... it the relation behind it that gets me. as a child, i moved from place to place and at times withdrew because making the connections and telling the stories took time, and hurt too much. i wanted not only to be connected to others but i craved acceptance from my peers. now, i tell stories on myself anytime someone asks a simple question.
why is your last name different from you family's?
- because once upon a time, i was married to a soldier...
where are you from?
- well, that's a long story...
how do you feel?
- ok, but i had the longest day...
how many stories do you tell a day?
2 comments:
I recall telling you one fo my stories (my only one, at the time) over coffee in a bookstore, in front of a fireplace. We all have many stories in us- some dominate at times, but at other times they fade into the background of our lives.
I took a class called "Narrative Therapy" when i was still in grad school. There is a whole disciplene of therapy devoted to the stories we tell ourselves about ourselves and let dominate our lives. I guess the gist of it is that everything is a matter of perspective. the story we tell ourselves may not be fairly told, and not the only story of our lives. I am certainly glad to have learned that since I first told you my dominate story.
That was really beautiful. I'm lucky to have such a wonderful cousin.
Love always,
Tracy
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